One of the biggest misconceptions is that we should always pursue happiness. Now with corona our happiness is put to the test. For example, because you have lost your job or because you feel lonely. However, happiness is also overrated. In fact, allowing yourself to feel deeply miserable at times can help you to feel happier afterwards. My advice: feel the negative emotions.
Negative emotions are useful
There is nothing wrong with being happy. The danger lies in the idea that we should always be happy. With this expectation, we leave little room for negative emotions. When we deny or hide negative emotions (like sadness, fear or anger) we will miss some important signals.
All our emotions, both positive and negative, have a function. They tell us what we need. That restless feeling when you get up in the morning before you go to work. Or the disappointment that you always feel within that one friendship. It can all be signals that you are missing or wanting something.
What to do with negative emotions?
By standing still and listening to that unhappy feeling, you make contact with yourself, with who you are and what you need. This can be challenging. Especially if you are not used to this. It starts with awareness: learn to recognize when you feel happy.
These tips can help:
- If someone asks you how you are doing, tell them how you are doing. Acknowledge when you feel bad and try to share it with others.
- Don’t be afraid of having unhappy feelings. Realize that negative emotions are not there forever and also pass.
- Remember that negative emotions are not meaningless, but can give you a lot of insight.
In the NiceDay app you can indicate how your mood is. Set a mood reminder for yourself several times a day. This can help you think more about how you really feel.