My name is Denise, I am 23 years old and I have been chronically ill for a few years. That means that I can be found in the hospital regularly. It is a place where I know my way around quite well. Yet I noticed that I was very dependent on others to go somewhere or to do things. Someone always came with me, including to my hospital appointments; I never did anything alone. During the treatment of my illness, this question came up: “Don’t you feel like it would be good to work on this, before we continue with the treatment?”.

Anxious

This question got me thinking. What if one day I can do everything I would like to do again, but I’m too afraid to do it? What if I finally feel good again, but don’t dare to take a walk and still stay at home? What if I find doing something on my own worse than spending my time sick at home? Then this might get in the way of my physical recovery.

The next step

Knowing it was time to do something about my anxiety, I made an appointment with my doctor. I was soon referred to the Parnassia Group and was told that I would be treated online. I found this a bit nerve wracking; I don’t find it very comfortable to talk to strangers on the phone. Still, I wanted to try and take the plunge. If I really didn’t like it, I could always request to see a psychologist face-to-face.

Video calling

I started my online trajectory and found out that I actually liked it. I found video calling a lot less scary than calling. Because you can still see the other person’s reaction and facial expression during the conversation, it quickly feels normal and familiar. It was almost as if I was on the phone with a friend.

Yet many people around me were curious whether it was not very impersonal, but I have never experienced it like that. In addition, I think it also helps that you are in your own environment; this makes it a lot easier to talk than somewhere in a random room.

Always at hand

In addition to video calling, I also made extensive use of the diary in my NiceDay app. I kept track of my thoughts and feelings, and it was a nice idea to know that my therapist was always looking out for me. After that,I started working with the Thought records. It could happen that I suddenly had a terrible panic attack on the subway, which is very annoying with all those people around you. But, I grabbed the app and started filling in a Thought schedule. I went through the questions, “What’s going on?” or “Why are you anxious now?”. That way I could try to calm my panic right away.

It’s going better

I am happy to say that I am now doing very well. I did have a relapse recently, but thanks to the tools I have been given, I can now deal with this. I can convince myself that I can and that I must continue. I still sometimes read articles on www.niceday.app. And if I am to have another relapse, I will just open the NiceDay app again!

Would you like more information about an online treatment via NiceDay? Click here for more information. Would you like to use the app independently? Of course you can! Click here to download the app.

Evy is 18 years-old, studies Journalism and is in the prime of her life. At an unexpected moment, she experiences something she had never experienced before: she had a panic attack. Not knowing that was what she was feeling, she thought there was something wrong with her heart. However, physically there was nothing wrong with Evy. Shocked and advised by a friend, she created an account with NiceDay that evening. Read more about Evy’s experience with online help below.

Quickly contacted

“Because I was very shaken by my panic attack, I wanted help as soon as possible, but I lived in Tilburg and was still registered with my GP in Zeeland. I did not want to wait and beside, I did not like the idea of ​​first telling my story to the doctor’s assistant and then again to a doctor. I was afraid this was going to take too much time and spoke to a friend about it. He told me about NiceDay, which he knew through another friend. Through NiceDay I was able to quickly get help. I downloaded the app and the next day I received a response from the NiceDay team. My intake interview was already scheduled for the following week. I explained what had happened and was linked to psychologist Sarah.”

Good connection with practitioner

“I felt a good connection with Sarah. All our conversations took place digitally. In the beginning this took some getting used to, but I felt safe with her and had no trouble opening up. During the conversations I felt heard and taken seriously and it felt like a safe environment to tell my story. ”

Advantages online treatment

“The advantage of online treatment is that it is very accessible. You don’t have to sit in a waiting room and tell your story to the doctor’s assistant first, then to the doctor and then to a psychologist. You can get help directly and for me there were no waiting lists. This makes mental help easily accessible. “

“At times it was confrontational, but very helpful, to gain insight into my thoughts. The trackers in the app allowed me to register my panic attacks, but also how I expected to feel in certain situations and whether I really felt that way. This helped me realize that things don’t always go the way you expect, it doesn’t always have to go wrong. ”

“It was also nice to stay active outside the sessions via the assignments or reading articles that Sarah sent me after each session. This allowed me to stay productive and reduce my stress. ”

Would you recommend NiceDay?

“I would definitely recommend NiceDay because it is so accessible. If you are unsure about approaching someone, or you don’t feel comfortable seeing a doctor, you can turn to NiceDay. You quickly get in touch with the NiceDay team and receive immediate help. I have experienced this as very positive. ”

Evy received online help through the NiceDay app. Would you like to know more about online help via NiceDay? Click here for more information.

Since 2015 I have been struggling with panic attacks. In that year, the company I worked for was taken over by a new owner. By nature I am a hard worker. However, my new boss raised the bar even higher and an even greater overtime culture was created. Everyone in the company participated. Me too! Because if you didn’t, you would get nasty comments about it.

 I regularly worked on in my free time. At that time my dizziness complaints started and later on panic attacks started to occur. They mainly happened on highway, but sometimes also in the supermarket. They were terrible! The feeling that I would faint and afterwards I that heavy tiredness as if I had practiced top sport. 

 I started to doubt my own abilities

 The obvious solution was to change jobs. However, I enjoyed my work and colleagues and I was scared to change jobs. I was mentally not at my strongest and in the meantime I was starting to doubt my abilities.

 At one point it was so bad that I was already nauseous and dizzy in the morning, afraid of what awaited me that day. I knew it was time to change jobs. This was no longer possible. Pretty soon I had found another nice job with nice colleagues. By changing jobs I had the expectation that the panic attacks would decrease or perhaps disappear. Unfortunately this was not true.

My way to NiceDay

 I was sick of it and needed tools to get the panic attacks under control. I started looking for the possibilities for online help. I read an experience story about a young woman who was often dizzy and with help of NiceDay her complaints were gone. I wanted this too!

 Work in progress 

 Soon I had my intake. This felt good! Apart from the fact that I felt there was a click, things went better after every session. My coach also guided me through the entire process. I received relaxation exercises, relaxing music, breathing exercises and more information. I also received exposure assignments. So I actively started looking for situations where I would get panic attacks. We evaluated the assignments via the app, chat and by telephone.

 We discussed my perfectionism and the fact that I have to indicate my boundaries more strongly at work. On this topic I also received interesting articles and tips which I started to apply in my daily life.

 More peace 

 I have become more alert to my mental and physical health. I get a bit more rest, don’t set the bar so high and I set my boundaries better. I also started exercising and meditating regularly. The panic attacks have been considerably reduced. It now even happens that they no longer continue. I’m really happy with it!

 NiceDay is for everyone 

 I can recommend NiceDay to anyone. Despite the fact that it is digital, it is still very personal. It is nice that you have an “appointment” with your psychologist every week. There are no weeks between sessions if you don’t want to, so you actively work on your recovery.

 I am very grateful to my coach Sarah, without her I would never have achieved what I have achieved now!

The first panic attack is unexpected, but after that you start fearing a repeat. You are afraid to get in a situation where you are not able to prevent a panic attack and start to avoid certain situations. The longer you wait to treat panic attacks, the more symptoms you might experience and the more it will affect your life. But how do you deal with it? We want to help you.

Control and awareness

The harder you try to restrain the panic attacks, the more difficult it gets. You start focusing on the problem, whereby you might let  yourself get dragged into it. Instead, try to let go of your fears and look for distraction. This does not mean you should avoid anxious situations! Be aware of the problem and prepare yourself for it: Describe in a diary how you feel before, during and after a panic attack. Confront yourself and consider what you could do to change the situation.

Rest and mindfulness

If you have had a panic attack before, you probably know how anxious it could be being alone at this moment. During a panic you lose trust in yourself, this is why you crave a different form of control. Tell someone you trust about your panic attacks and ask them if they can support you in case of a panic attack. In this way it will be less scary to tackle the panic.

Also mindfulness can help you to get control. Mindfulness helps you to control your  breathing and gives you the opportunity to get your fears in perspective. Are your fears based on anything (or are you talking yourself into it)? Clear your head and get back down to earth. Next to that, when you suffer from panic attacks most likely, you’ re not breathing properly. Tension in your body has a big effect on your breathing, it can reduce your breath ability with 30 percent. So focusing on your breath will help a lot, try for example this exercise.

Lifestyle and caffeine

If you do not feel well, you get more sensitive. A healthy lifestyle keeps your hormone system in balance. Eat healthy, exercise enough, go to bed on time and relax enough. Try not to drink that much caffeine, since the physical effects of caffeine can make you more sensitive for a panic attack.

Coaching

Maybe you are ashamed of your panic attacks, or you believe it is temporary. However, it is better to seek help, together we are stronger than alone! A coach can help you get to the roots of you panic attack and together you can look for possible solutions. Click here for more information about online help via NiceDay.

This article is a follow-up to this article. We reluctantly drove over that field. I felt all those eyes on us and it got super suffocating. In a corner we parked the van and set up our camp timidly. We were hiding behind our van. When we hid there it was okay, and we even forgot that there were others. But you can not avoid it. When you had to go to the toilet or get water you had to walk past all those people, people who look, nod, say something or even want to have a chat. The tension increased more and more. I tried to endure it, to suck it up, to let it slip, to ignore it. But of course, that didn’t work out.

Panic

In the afternoon we made a long walk. That was nice. We relaxed and felt the freedom, silence and peace of mind which we apparently needed so badly. We could be ourselves again and we were happy. Until we had to go back to the van to go back to the campsite. Dark clouds were gathering together. I started the van but less than a hundred meters further I started to panic, I did not know where to go. Then I drove the van to the side of the road. I looked straight ahead with frightened eyes. ‘What is the matter’, my girlfriend asked, and the crying started. Helplessly I was trapped in my fear. I just could not handle it anymore.

You can always leave

My girlfriend, my dear, comforted me and reminded me of the rule that we agreed on: if one of us can’t cope anymore, we will just go, without questioning, whining or complaining. Through my tears I saw her emphatic smile. The acceptance, security and love gave me the ground to stand upon again.
I started the van and we drove to the campsite relieved. The panic was lulled, the anguish disappeared without feeling guilty or weak. This is what we do so well. I am quite proud of that. How well we succeed every time dealing with my fears or her autism. We not only accept how we are, we also say yes wholeheartedly to each other, with all our disorders, our limitation and our problems. We give each other unconditional security so that we can be who we are, do things or try something new. We do not mind if it goes wrong. Our love is also unconditional so that we can deal with our disability and disruptions without shame. It is all good and if not then still, we often say to each other.

Self-mockery

And self-mockery, that is also our strength. At the campsite we drove very slowly, gaudy and mockingly observing the central social campeniers field. We laughed like two jolly toddlers while we were demonstratively packing our things. While we saw the others looking at us, we took it a step further and made a caricature of ourselves. We acted our most psychologically disordered behaviors. Absurdism at its peak! Cheerful, happy and free from fear we left and left this ‘oh so cozy campsite’.

We were on our way back home. Hell had closed its gates again and the rain stopped falling within us. To reward ourselves for our fantastic coping strategy, we decided to go out for a lovely dinner in Amerongen before we went into the night together.

With healthy tension, I opened the classroom door. Bang! I saw a bunch of noisy people in a small room. 28 Eyes looking at me. Anxiety hits me!

Within a fraction of a second I became stressed out. I quickly gazed down, and made myself smaller. Uncomfortable as a schoolboy I wriggled with my briefcase: unobtrusively I tried to get my stuff out while sweat was pouring from my back. I wanted to be invisible. Rather run away. But there I was, being a little loser.

“Take control!” I thought. “Act, now! Not privy but firm, with strength “, it shouted through my head. “Oh, this will go wrong,” said the critic, “you can’t do it.” At this point I really started to panic. “Did you not learn anything from all those years of therapy?” I wondered. “It’s alright’’ said the merciful, “it will be fine.” I took a deep breath.

And then it happened: I made a decision. I straightened my back, straightened my head and looked around the classroom. I consciously took possession of the space. I took the time to watch everyone. With eye contact I said ‘good evening, I’m the teacher’. Super scary, but it felt good too. I felt proud and with this, my confidence strengthened. ‘’I always find it a bit scary, the first lesson’’ I stated. People nodded confirming with understanding. The ice broke and I got into my role. In my thoughts, I thanked my drama therapist.

Plagued by fear

That used to be different: I used to be plagued by fear. I used to run away and crawl under a rock. It took a lot of time before I dared to try again. I have had a lot of therapy, including cognitive therapy. That was a good way to become aware of the distorted way I apparently looked at the world, to others and to myself. My social fear came from such a wrong way of thinking. The fear, in turn, reinforced this distorted way. Thus, I was stuck in this vicious circle. Cognitive therapy definitely reduced my extreme fears, but it all remained, well, very cognitive, too rational. And I was already living too much in my head. I was like a head on two feet that had an anxious body hanging down.

Introduction to drama therapy

So, I came to drama therapy. What a difference it was. There was a lot of attention to the physical aspect of my social anxiety. Here I learned to be in concrete existence, to be socially present with all my being: soul and body – to state it a bit zen. But drama therapy was not vague at all: it was super concrete instead. Social situations were elaborated and practised. At first I thought that it would be oh so dramatic and theatrical. Yes, sometimes there were a lot of tears, hard words, intense emotions. Of course, the events discussed were real painful events, from my own experiences and the group’s own experiences.

But we also did games often. Yes games! As children do in the playground. Super scary if you have a social phobia. Fooling around, making strange sounds, or chair dancing, playing hints, and more socially visible activities – exposure! My traumas were triggered, but those games often led to hilarious moments too. So, I learned to recognize the playful child in my mind and let it go free. Something I have never learned to make room for in my life.

Moving forward

Drama therapy was already very confrontational, socially visible and emotional. But above all, it was very instructive and helpful to me. I learned to use my body, to get used to live in my body. Practice time and again with presence, visibility and experience what you feel about a situation, how your body responds, was very helpful and healing. After two years I personally changed, both in my thinking and in my body. My body and mind are again one – to say it in a wishy washy way.

“Fantastic!” You would say. Pfff, unfortunately no. It is not so sunny all the time. Fear will always be a part of my life. That remains a bitter pill to swallow. However, as soon as I experience panic feelings in social situations, I can give it a place in my body. I can trust that I can stand and that I will remain. And if I accidentally stumble, fall into fear and tremble, I’ll straighten my back, lift my head, look straight into the room around me and breathe deeply. I dare to come and enter rooms again.