Evy is 18 years-old, studies Journalism and is in the prime of her life. At an unexpected moment, she experiences something she had never experienced before: she had a panic attack. Not knowing that was what she was feeling, she thought there was something wrong with her heart. However, physically there was nothing wrong with Evy. Shocked and advised by a friend, she created an account with NiceDay that evening. Read more about Evy’s experience with online help below.

Quickly contacted

“Because I was very shaken by my panic attack, I wanted help as soon as possible, but I lived in Tilburg and was still registered with my GP in Zeeland. I did not want to wait and beside, I did not like the idea of ​​first telling my story to the doctor’s assistant and then again to a doctor. I was afraid this was going to take too much time and spoke to a friend about it. He told me about NiceDay, which he knew through another friend. Through NiceDay I was able to quickly get help. I downloaded the app and the next day I received a response from the NiceDay team. My intake interview was already scheduled for the following week. I explained what had happened and was linked to psychologist Sarah.”

Good connection with practitioner

“I felt a good connection with Sarah. All our conversations took place digitally. In the beginning this took some getting used to, but I felt safe with her and had no trouble opening up. During the conversations I felt heard and taken seriously and it felt like a safe environment to tell my story. ”

Advantages online treatment

“The advantage of online treatment is that it is very accessible. You don’t have to sit in a waiting room and tell your story to the doctor’s assistant first, then to the doctor and then to a psychologist. You can get help directly and for me there were no waiting lists. This makes mental help easily accessible. “

“At times it was confrontational, but very helpful, to gain insight into my thoughts. The trackers in the app allowed me to register my panic attacks, but also how I expected to feel in certain situations and whether I really felt that way. This helped me realize that things don’t always go the way you expect, it doesn’t always have to go wrong. ”

“It was also nice to stay active outside the sessions via the assignments or reading articles that Sarah sent me after each session. This allowed me to stay productive and reduce my stress. ”

Would you recommend NiceDay?

“I would definitely recommend NiceDay because it is so accessible. If you are unsure about approaching someone, or you don’t feel comfortable seeing a doctor, you can turn to NiceDay. You quickly get in touch with the NiceDay team and receive immediate help. I have experienced this as very positive. ”

Evy received online help through the NiceDay app. Would you like to know more about online help via NiceDay? Click here for more information.

Anne works as a psychologist. She noticed she started to feel gloomy and insecure, and started a treatment within NiceDay. Here you can read all about her experience with online help.

Curious

“I heard about NiceDay by a tip from my supervisor. He told me that it might be an interesting app to use with my clients. I got curious and downloaded the app to have a look. I decided I was going to use the app for myself and started filling in the diary and thought records. However, I noticed that using these records alone wasn’t going to help me enough.”

“It was the beginning of the Corona crisis and I, myself, had also started online sessions and video calls with my clients. The concept of online treatment was already becoming usual practice. Why wouldn’t I try online coaching? I registered and was linked to psychologist Sarah.”

Good connection

“With Sarah I felt a good connection. During our first session, I noticed that there was a good balance between her preparation of the questionnaire I had filled in, and the subjects she brought up. The questions she raised were in line with my own experience and knowledge. Sometimes, for example, she looked up information or articles about things I didn’t know, and then sent them to me to read.”

“Also, Sarah was able to add a critical note: “Maybe you have learned it this way, but is it actually true and does it really work like that?”. I appreciated that.”

Helpful usabilities of the app

“The thought records were very useful to me. Because the questions are asked step by step, you are guided through them. Of course you can think of those questions yourself, but seeing them step by step on a screen makes that it doesn’t have to come from your own strength. This helps you see things from a different perspective.”

“What I also like was that you always have the app with you. You may not be able to use it at work, but you can use it when you’re on your way back home. You always have it at hand.”

“The app made me feel like there was always someone looking over my shoulder. I agreed with Sarah that if I wanted her to read along with my thoughts, I would put her name on my journal entry. But even when I did not, I still felt that I was directing my thought to someone else. By using the app, I got the feeling that someone was looking over my shoulder, and was there to support and stimulate my self-development.”

Would you recommend the NiceDay app?

“I haven’t used the app for very long time, but have already recommended it to others. So yes, if I think someone could benefit from it, I would recommend it. I had a positive experience with the online help; Sarah really helped me to look at things from a different perspective. Because of Corona most of us are working online, so it is definitely good to ask for online help.”

Rosa received online help through the NiceDay app. Would you like to know more about online help via NiceDay? Click here for more information.

Stress and anxiety start in your brains, but they have strong effect on your body too. Palpitations, sweating, a rushed feeling: these are all physical experiences we associate with stress or anxiety. But did you know that they can also have a huge effect on your skin? According to research, stress and anxiety can worsen existing skin conditions like acne or psoriasis, or even cause them.

Stressful times

In research done on 101 people that have psoriasis disease, half of the people stated that the disease arose during a stressful time in their lives. About two thirds of the group stated that their symptoms worsened when they felt a higher pressure. 

Another study on female medical students in Saudi Arabia indicates that stress had a major impact on the increase or worsening of their acne.

While in the medical world, psychology for the mind and dermatology for the skin are seen as two separate parts, they do influence each other. Dermatologist and Professor Francisco Tausk, from the University Medical Center at Rochester, explains how this works.

The physical effect of stress

When you experience a stressful situation, whether you are late for an exam or you are in danger, your body produces chemicals. The chemical that your body produces is norepinephrine, which causes your heart to pound and your muscles to tighten for the fight or flight response. But, these chemicals have a nasty side effect: they also produce molecules that cause inflammation. These inflammations can cause psoriasis or acne.

The cortisol hormone can be a helping hand. It stops the stress reaction and decreases inflammation. However, during stressful situations this hormone is torn down. People that have psoriasis or acne already have a lower cortisol level and cannot produce enough of it to combat the consequences. The inflammation gets worse and your sebaceous glands produce more and more oils. The result? A worsening of the skin condition.

Mood swings

On the other hand, skin problems often cause mood swings. Teens with acne have low self-esteem or are being bullied. Adults with psoriasis are ashamed for their skin and fear that no one dares to touch them. Sometimes it even makes them avoid social gatherings. Beside, some medication for skin problems has a side effect of depressive feelings. This way stress and skin diseases continue to reinforce each other and you end up in a vicious circle.

What can you do?

When you manage to tackle one of these problems you can break the vicious circle you’re in. You can go to a dermatologist to tackle your skin problems, but you can also start with your mind. Professor Tausk often advises his patients to start with mindfulness, yoga or meditation. Below you can find several blogs to help you make a head start:

When your skin problems arise from depression or anxiety, it can help to start with cognitive behavioral therapy. Visit your doctor for a referral.

When the evening falls and my eyes are starting to feel heavy, I lift myself off  the couch and head towards my favorite place: my bed. Ever since I was little my bed has been important to me. It stands for safety and security. I used to hide under the blankets, scared of monsters and burglars. When I got older my bed got another meaning: besides safety and security it gave me comfort. Feeling safe is a big topic in my life right now. I started asking myself with whom and where I feel safe, now that I am 25 years old. Did something change? Or do I still only feel safe in my own bed?

Where do you feel safe?

During multiple therapy sessions I have been asked where I feel most safe. In the beginning it took me quite some time to find an answer to that question. The only answer that would pop up was: I feel safe in my own bed. It was when I said it out loud that I started to realize. I felt sad that I didn’t feel safe while being with a person, but with an object. I thought something was wrong with me. Later I found out that it wasn’t the bed that gave me comfort, but the blanket. The weight of the blanket made me feel like I was being hugged. The warmth and softness of the blanket gave me peace and comfort and helped soften the pain.

With whom do you feel safe?

Two weeks ago I had another EMDR session. By the end of the session a memory came up. It was the Summer of 2016 and I had just returned home from a session with the POH-GGZ. I had told her about something that was extremely hard for me. Once I got home in my student home I burst into tears. I felt so much pain and sadness, but I was too scared to talk about it and felt so alone. To comfort myself I laid down in my bed with the heavy blanket wrapped around me. After telling my therapist about this memory she asked me the following: “If this were to happen now, who would you want to be with you?”. This time it didn’t take me long to know the answer. 

I feel safe with you

I have said it so many times. With you I feel safe. At the same time my mind and my body aren’t on the same page. My mind keeps telling me that I am not allowed to feel safe with you and that I should ignore the feeling. My body on the other hand keeps telling me the exact opposite. I know where this battle is coming from. In my past there have been people that have violated my trust and therefore I am extra cautious when I start feeling attached to someone. I don’t easily open up to other people, only when I can physically feel that everything’s alright. 

And that happened with you. I keep insuring myself that I don’t have to be afraid. That I don’t have to fear that you won’t treat my right. That the security that I feel with you is genuine and that I can trust my body on this. The inner battle is still ongoing and I accept that it is. That’s all I can do right now. There’s no use in fighting it. 

Love, Ghyta

Find all Ghyta’s experience stories here.

Meet my friend Sylvia, she is 80 years old, we have known each other for 7 years now and we regularly meet to eat and chat. With an age difference of 50 years and very different backgrounds, we have a fascinating friendship and are open to each other’s perspectives and ideas in life.

This won’t affect us. That was our initial thought, until the first infection in the Netherlands was reported and Prime Minister Mark Rutte announced the official guidelines regarding the corona virus on Monday the 23rd of March. When this happened what were your first thoughts?

I was very happy with the guidelines and I wasn’t worried for myself. I thought: I am healthy and I am strong. I feel lively and have been active all my life. I tried to remind myself: only listen to the news once a day and only listen to the experts. There is a lot of panic in the news, and this created a lot of anxiety in my environment. Everyone around me was talking about it, it was the hot topic. I go outside every day, to take a walk in a quiet place. I usually do this with one person that I keep at a distance.

I am aware that people over 80 are more vulnerable. Deterioration of your organs and immune system is something to be expected with old age. I am realistic and won’t let it get to my head.

Do you or have you felt alone during this period?

There has been no change in my feelings of loneliness before or during corona. As always, I maintain social contact through the telephone. I do miss going to the museum alot and visiting my granddaughter in Amsterdam. I don’t take public transport. Further than that, I don’t feel limited. I have a car and can drive anywhere.

Do you or have you felt gloomy?

My mood has not changed during or by corona. I still think: I am so happy that I have traveled so much. Portugal, Mexico, Curaçao, Kenya, South Africa, wow! I am so glad that I have been able to have this experience. Remembering this gives me great pleasure.

Imagine someone you know feels alone or anxious. What would you say to that person?

I advised my friend to still leave the house occasionally, to get some fresh air and stay active. Besides that, one thing I hadn’t done is meet my granddaughter. After a few weeks, my son came along with my granddaughter. I had seen a child psychologist briefly on the youth news. A child said, “I am not sick and neither is my grandmother. Can I go visit my grandmother? And the psychologist said, “Yes you may!” Based on that, I thought: I am healthy, I will make sure that I still see my granddaughter.

Has the news ever made you feel anxious?

I can put it into perspective fairly quickly. I try to rationalize it. I am also lucky with my genetics. There are no diseases in the family. I have a good immune system for my age, partly due to my genetics but also due to my lifestyle. I love simple and healthy food.

The corona guidelines are being relaxed. What did you think about this and how are you going to behave?

I am happy that the schools have opened again for all children. Some of the conditions at home are bad, it is tough for children to continuously focus on a screen, learning difficulties can arise. I used to work in education, so I can really sympathize with them. I am glad that the children can see their friends again. I think the catering industry is a big step. I will not be so quick to sit on a terrace. I definitely want to go to the museum, if there are good safety measures in place. On a small terrace with enough space, yes I will sit there. I am aware of the actions I make and I don’t really feel any different.

What are your top tips for others?

– Go outside and stay active.
– Keep in touch with your friends, and stay in contact.

Humans are social animals: we are dependent of others and like to do things together. How we behave and what we say can also be influenced by the people in our direct environment. Sometimes, it even looks like others even determine who you are, how much you are worth as a person and which qualities you possess. Nowadays, we are so caught up with what others think of us, or actually what we think others think of us, that we sometimes forget who we actually are!

Three times yourself

Edward Tory Higgins is the inventor of the self discrepancy theory. This theory states that individuals compare themselves to self created standards as well as to how others might see us. Higgins states that an individual has three ‘selves’:

  • The actual self: this is how you look at yourself.
  • The ideal self: this is who we would like to be.
  • The ought self: this is how you want to be seen by others.

Ideally, it would be nice when the actual self is exactly the same as the ideal & the ought self. Then the image of ourselves matches with who we would like to be and how we want to be perceived by others. If the actual & the ideal self differ a lot, this can lead to feelings of disappointment and sadness. Research states that clinical depressed patients have the biggest difference between the two selves. When the actual & the ought self differ a lot, this can lead to feelings of agitation, guilt, stress and even anxiety. Research states that people with social anxiety have the biggest difference between these two.

Tips for a better self image

Our dependency on others can lead to the underestimation of our actual self or to having too high expectations of our ideal & ought self. So it’s good to become aware of who we actually are and what we (can) expect of ourselves. And you can do it like this:

  • Describe yourself in 3 sentences and write down your strengths, qualities and characteristics. Also write down how your mother or your best friend would describe you. Is there a difference between the two descriptions? If so, why is that?
  • Keep a positive diary daily. Often, we forget all the positive things we do during the day and we tend to remember the negative. The way we look at ourselves should be determined by both!
  • Do you notice you experience anxiety in situations in which you value the opinion of others a lot? You can examine if the image you hold about yourself or the way you think others look at you is actually in line with reality. Is it true you’re not nice, not good enough, not a good parent or not a good friend? Or is it the anxiety that makes you think like this? Try looking at the situation from a different perspective! What would you say to a friend when he/she has similar beliefs about himself/herself? 
  • Think about your own standards and expectations. Are they realistic and achievable? Would you want others to be like this? Aren’t you using words like ‘always’ or ‘never’? Aren’t you describing everything using “I have to…”? Or are you actually pretty tough on yourself? Write everything down and think for yourself if you might have to adjust your expectations a little bit.

NiceDay

Do you notice you’re not feeling well and you can be a bit negative about yourself? Or do you want to improve your awareness of who you really are? Write down these exercises in the NiceDay app in a diary registration!

 

Do you want more time for yourself to recover from all you appointments? How much time do you take for your rest and relaxation? Do you have sufficient balance between your social life and time for yourself? Read more about it in this blog.

The overwhelming feeling of a busy social life

The invitations from your friends, the reactions to your photos on instagram and all other social activities may give you the feeling that you are a nice person and that people want to get together with you.

Or maybe you have a social life because you are afraid of missing things. The fear of missing out the social things is called FOMO. Because you are afraid of missing something, you accept all invitations and never cancel anything. Not even when you are tired. Do you ever have the feeling that you do not want to miss those appointments and that you do not want to disappoint your friends? Then it is possible you are suffering from FOMO.

Your energy is like a battery

It is important to allow yourself time to relax and recover from any stress. A person can be compared to a battery. The energy of the battery is drained by all efforts, stress, annoyances or even by contacts with people. You can recharge this battery at moments of rest, recovery and relaxation. Or with other ways of self-care.

How do you ensure a good balance between social life and yourself?

It is important to find a balance between your social life and time for yourself. Here are some tips:

  1. Take plenty of rest, time for yourself and ensure a good night’s sleep. Do you have many appointments? Try to keep some moments free for yourself. That way you won’t get tired of your appointments.
  2. Know that it is okay to reschedule or cancel an appointment. Your friends and family will understand if you need time for yourself.
  3. Discover for yourself which circumstances cause you to experience tension, stress or when you feel overwhelmed.
  4. You can create some moments of rest for yourself during appointments with friends, for example by going to the toilet.
  5. Use mindfulness or meditation exercises to experience peace.
  6. You can enter a thought record. This allows you to see an overview of the feelings, thoughts and event that you experienced during those appointments. Give it a try.

NiceDay app

Try to schedule appointments with friends and the moments for yourself in the NiceDay app. You can also reflect on how you experienced it.

Mr. R. came to my to work on his anxiety complaints. An online treatment at Synaeda. This is his experience!

Why was help needed?

Mr. R. had suffered from agoraphobia at a young age, in his case he was very anxious about large open spaces. In his youth he had already received treatment, which helped him a lot. However, he recently recently noticed that his anxiety obstructs his professional functioning. The lessons learned in the past did not help him sufficiently in a recent situation.

What did the treatment look like?

First we identified how his anxiety hindered him in his work. After this he started to seek for opportunities to practice his tools. The patient strongly controlled this. He went to work actively with all practice situations that we had thought up or could occur. In addition, we pay attention to what frightened him and how he might think differently to overcome his fears.

R’s personal experience with NiceDay

After concluding a successful treatment, I asked him to share his experience.

“When I wanted to go to Synaeda for treatment for my anxiety disorder, I was given the choice to do this via NiceDay. This would mean that the sessions would not take place on location, but that all contact would take place via video calling or chat.

First of all, I was somewhat skeptical. I had expected a great deal of distance between the psychologist  and me literally and figuratively. Yet the opposite proved true. Marjilde soon gave me the feeling that an online treatment does not necessarily means distance. Moreover, this method of treatment gives you the space to have an session at work, for example. You therefore have no travel time to the relevant location of Synaeda.

The guidance via NiceDay is also very pleasant. You can easily keep a diary, in which you write down, for example, the moments you worked on your fear and how you felt about it. The practitioner reads this and returns to this during the next interview. The app also offers the option to send a chat message to your practitioner if you have questions.

If you have doubts about following an online treatment with NiceDay, I can understand that. Nevertheless, my experience has been positive, I have noticed little difference between this way of treatment and having conversations with a coach or psychologist  in the same room. On the contrary, it has the advantage that you have no travel time and you can decide for yourself where you want to have the conversation. ”

For privacy reasons we have anonymized the name in this text.

Accepting is often easier said than done. Acceptance means you have recognition for what you encounter, without wanting it to solve immediately. You start to see it as a part of your current life without making it bigger or smaller. This way, you can investigate how you can live by your values ​​despite the psychological problems you experience. I would like to share 2 books that may help you accept your current process.

Tip 1: My friend fear – Meera Lee Patel 

book fearMeera Lee Patel is an illustrator and bundled her experiences with fears into a beautiful and special book. Patel challenges you to investigate what happens when you listen to your fears. What can happen if you embrace your fears and use them to empower yourself?

With many questions form the book you will find out of what you are actually afraid of. The writer tells about her personal experiences with fear and how she sees her fear as her best friend. The book is an easy read, has beautiful illustrations and it inspires you to be a little milder towards yourself.

Curious? You can order this book here.

Tip 2: Stronger than ever – Brené Brown

The book “Stronger than ever” is the 4th book written by Brené Brown. This time the theme of the book: trial and error. Brown is a happiness researcher and combines scientific information with personal experiences of others and of herself. With this she immediately sets the right example. Brown argues for a revolution: dare to be honest about failing. She describes which phases you go through and how to get up again. This takes courage!

Through the personal stories of others and the author you will get the feeling that you are not alone.

I recommend this book! You can order the book here.

Have fun reading!

Want to read more?

In this blog we share more tips!

When do you drink too much alcohol and what effect does that have on you? And if you drink too much, how can you reduce your drinking? Because is alcohol really that harmful?  

According to the Trimbos, someone drinks excessively at more than 21 glasses per week for men and more than 14 glasses per week for women. Yet it is not that simple, the moment when it gets too much is different for every person. You could also say that if you experience side effects, you drink excessively in your case. Think of poor sleep after alcohol intake, often suffering from headache or when you start to forget things. It is of course best not to drink alcohol at all.

Gloomy or anxious? This is what alcohol does with your complaints

Alcohol problems are often accompanied by mental disorders. People often drink alcohol because they are gloomy or anxious. Alcohol causes someone to become gloomy, to feel anxious and to become more tense. However, this does not happen immediately, because as you may know it often feels good on the day itself. For example, you feel more brave and energetic. You only feel the negative effect the days after alcohol consumption. When you start treatment for your symptoms, you are also usually required to stop using alcohol (temporarily). This way you find out which complaints arise from alcohol consumption and which are caused by other factors. In addition, there is a greater chance that symptoms will decrease faster and you will therefore benefit more from your treatment.

This is how your body processes alcohol

You arrive from alcohol. Alcoholic drinks often contain a lot of calories! To give an example, five glasses of beer are based on the average number of calories of an evening meal. In addition, when you drink alcohol your body will first process the alcohol. This means there is less time for burning, for example, sugars and carbohydrates. Alcohol consumption even lowers your fat burning. Suppose you enjoy a cheese platter with a glass of wine, so the cheese platter arrives twice as hard. Without wine, your body starts burning the sugars and carbohydrates in the cheese much earlier.

Your liver takes about 1.5 hours to process one standard glass of alcohol. This means that if you drank eight glasses of alcohol one evening, your body takes twelve hours to process this. There is a good chance that you will still be under the influence the next morning, which means that you are not allowed to drive a car.

Many people use alcohol to sleep better. But nothing less is true! Alcohol ensures that you fall asleep quickly, but also that you recover much less during your sleep. You will therefore wake up more rested without alcohol consumption, even though it will take longer for you to fall asleep.

Alcohol also has a narcotic effect. It actually slows down your bodily functions. Ultimately, this will cause your heart rate and breathing to fall with the risk of unconsciousness or to stop breathing and heart rate. 2.8 million world citizens die each year from the effects of harmful alcohol consumption (Kypri & McCambridge, 2018).

How harmful is alcohol?

Alcohol can cause liver fat and eventually the formation of scar tissue on the liver, causing it to no longer function properly. It also causes brain damage. With a daily drink of six glasses of alcohol, the loss of brain tissue can already be clearly seen. Alcohol consumption increases the risk of bleeding from the brain, heart problems, breast, throat, oral cavity, esophagus and liver cancer, kidney failure, stomach ulcers, diabetes, Alzheimer’s disease and infectious diseases.

If you drink alcohol regularly, there is a good chance that you will get a vitamin B1 deficiency. It is therefore strongly recommended to supplement this with vitamin B1 or B-complex pills (high dose). You can simply buy this at the drugstore! Consequences of this vitamin deficiency are, for example, depression, irritability, low energy, concentration problems, stimulation in hands and feet, poor sleep and ultimately Korsakov’s disease.

How do you deal with alcohol consumption?

Alcohol seems to be a very accepted means in our society, which apparently has many negative sides. It gives the impression that some people would rather not see these sides. Yet it seems that people are becoming more aware of the harmful effects of alcohol. More and more people are taking an “alcohol-free month” or switching to alcohol-free beer or wine and find that they feel much better about it. Give it a try and see what it does to you! Are you unable to reduce or stop your alcohol consumption? There is enough help available and you are not the only one who needs help.