Doubt rises when we have to make a decisions. However, sometimes that doubt prevails. You enter the vicious circle of doubting. In this blog I explain why you should stop with doubting is a good resolution.
Doubting can make you uncertain about every action you try to take or every thought you get about daily decisions. It doesn’t only have to be about decisions, but also about ourselves. Doubting can cause us to end up in a vicious circle of negative thoughts. Which, in turn may hinder our personal growth. In the mind of a doubter it is so busy with thoughts that one listens less to one’s own intuition.
When do we start to doubt?
- Afraid of making a wrong decision: it is difficult to make the right choice when two different consequences can occur. Suppose you have to make a choice between going out with friends or having dinner with the family. In one situation you have a good time with friends, but you feel sorry that you didn’t go out to dinner with your family. This can cause you to doubt, because you are not sure whether you have made the right choice.
- Worry: people who doubt can think endlessly. Every worry that comes to mind reinforces the feeling of doubt. Have you also noticed that the longer you think, the more you start to doubt? Every worrying thought makes you think about the situation: what can happen, what if I don’t do it or what if it doesn’t end well?
- Low self-confidence: we often doubt, because we doubt ourselves. When there is little self-confidence, it is often difficult to make a choice. The more self-confidence you have, the easier it is to make a decision.
What happened to the way we think and act when we are in doubt?
Doubting is a cognitive process that can sometimes cause negative emotions. If you try to make a choice between two options, feelings of doubt can take over. When both options have different advantages and disadvantages, it is difficult to make a choice based on those (dis)advantages. With this in mind it reinforces the sense of doubt. In addition, you also experience negative emotion if you have not made the right choice.
Tips to stop doubting
- Dare to make a choice: try to base the choice you make on what you like and not on what others think of it. Don’t be afraid to make the wrong choice
- Be active: by actively looking for what makes you doubt. Always ask yourself: what do I need to doubt less? An answer can be: make a decision. Too much thinking makes it increasingly difficult for you to make a decision. If it happens that you made a mistake by making a wrong decision, no problem! You can learn from a mistake!
- Listen to yourself: ask yourself what you really want. Believe in your own intuition to make the right choice. It is okay to experience feelings of doubt. Learn to acknowledge and accept these feelings.
- Be kind to yourself: it can happen that you set the bar very high for yourself when making a decision. Learn to accept that you are good the way you are. More ideas in het blog: Treat yourself as how you would treat a friend.
Write in a journal in the NiceDay App which doubts you have. What has worked for you to stop doubting? What kind of feelings do you have when in doubt? And what do you need to stop doubting?