How can you involve your loved ones into your healing process? I personally have experienced first-hand how a mental illness can affect your relationships. There are 3 lessons I learned in my experience in talking about my mental health with my loved ones.
#1 Honesty
Before you seek professional help, you and your loved ones notice that it is not going well with you. In my case, my perfectionism and fear of failing lead towards a burn out. This meant I was overly emotional in every situation that happened. I was exhausted, all the time! And I experienced panic attacks. In this phase I was projecting emotions on my loved ones when I was tired or when I was angry at myself . Whenever I felt like I was exhausted and someone asked me if I could do something, instead of communicating what was happening to me and how I felt, I just said; “yes I can”. Obviously, I couldn’t do it. And when they asked why I didn’t do what I said I would do my loved ones got angry.
So the first thing to do is to acknowledge that you are not okay. Share it with the people closest to you. Even if you have no label for the things you are experiencing, it is important to just tell them exactly what is going on with you.
#2 Keyword is communication
When you seek mental help, you are learning tools to deal with yourself and the people around you. In this phase you will often feel more hopeful and with the tools you have learned from your health professional, you will often notice some shift in a positive sense. I noticed that my panic attacks were reduced and that I was able to deal with my fear of failure more constructive.
However, when I stopped having panic attacks I noticed my surroundings thinking more often that I was ‘’healed’’ completely. Which also meant, they started treating me like a healthy person and demanding more from me. I wasn’t ready for that. But because I was so happy and proud of the progress I made, I felt like I wanted to prove to myself. And I pretended to be able to adhere to the new demands. Let me tell you, the few steps that I went in a forward direction, I went twice as much steps back when I tried to do more than I was able to. This meant that I had to communicate more and clearly. Just because I have no physical symptoms anymore, does not mean that my mental health problems are solved.
#3 Keep learning
Besides communication, it’s also important to educate yourself and your loved ones. When you know what it is you are dealing with, it is important to gain knowledge on this topic. The more you understand what is going on with you, the more you can create understanding by your loved ones. In this way, you will feel more supported by your loved ones.
Thanks for reading my blog and have a nice day!
With love,
Sabrina
