The past year has been eventful. From feeling down to feeling happy and showing my true self. In this blog post I want to share my positive moments in 2017 with you.

Of course, negative things happened, but I think it is also important to share the good stories! Unfortunately, we often forget positive experiences, since negative experiences have a bigger impact on your memory.

An invisible girl

Conquering my insecurities has been a big eye-opener for me. I used to be the girl in the back, now I am a woman who dares to show who she is. This made it possible for me to dare to make choices for myself.

For example choosing a study in a direction which makes me happy and being bold enough to contact an employer I wanted to work for. And both succeeded! It has been such a great learning experience!

I also began to write blog posts for NiceDay this year. Another step in the right direction and I never thought it would feel so natural. This is already blog post number 20!

Therapy

Ending group therapy after 9 months. Every thursday morning I used to be in a room of women who are trying to help themselves and each other. Leaving that behind feels great, I feel strong. Next to group therapy, I also started trauma therapy in January. It has been difficult, but I found the woman I was looking for: Renée. It is me and no one else!

I also fought (and more or less conquered) anorexia and PTSD. The support of my loved ones helped me a lot. If I look back, I can be very proud of myself because on what I have achieved this year.

Private life

The relationship with my parents grew stronger after I started to tell them what was going on in my mind. They got an idea of my battle and saw it growing inside me. It felt so great to finally share my thoughts! I never want to stop talking about my issues anymore. I also dealt with the conflicts I had with persons who mean something to me. This has been so important for me, I am so happy I dared to confront myself.

Health

I knew my health was not completely fine. This year I finally dared to look for the cause of the problems, to find out what I need to make it better. It gives rest to work on my health, both my physical and mental well-being. I can see it matters.

Enjoying life

I can enjoy life again! A motor ride, a good book or a glass of wine on the couch. A spontaneous dance in the living room when a good song plays, four episodes of my favorite series… Great, right?! Or a burst of laughter with my love, tears of laughter even, I missed that so much! But it is back!

Grateful

I will use this moment to express gratitude to all of my loved ones. They never gave up on me, even when I was having a hard time. I think I do not express it much enough, so:

Dear parents and their partners: thank you for all the hours on the couch, a shoulder to cry on and for all the support! I cannot say it often enough, thank you for being there for me. During good and bad times.

Dear R.K. We are friends for 4 years now and you are one of the most loyal followers of my blog posts. Thank you for hearing my stories, drinking glasses of wine with me, being crazy together and for the book. Cheers on many more years together!

J.T. Another loyal follower of the blog posts! Thank you for the support and sweet words last year. I know you are going through a rough time right now. But you will get through it too! Together with you loving partner, you can do it!

I vd S. We are reunited! Thank you for listening to me. I do not want to lose you as a friend, you are so important for me. Cheers to a lot of motor rides and glasses of wines in 2018, but without combining those activities!

My sweet mother in law, turning her laptop on every wednesday to read my blog post, to talk about it next day during dinner. Thanks for the trust and openness. I hope we can keep on laughing together!

M.G., thank you for the hugs, support and dances! It is one hour in the week which is very important to me. Upcoming year we will rock the dancefloor, I look forward to it!

Sweethearts: C&L, B.J., P. de L, M&N and L den B. You also have a place in my heart. It is so great that your door is always open for me, also when I am not doing well. But also when I do feel well! I am very happy to have you!

And lost but not least… My partner, my best friend, my buddy. Thank you for being there. We can laugh, but also talk. You do not blame me for making mistakes. You try to understand me and love me for who I am. I can be myself, I can also show my not-so-good qualities. I can sing completely off key next to you in the car without any shame, and you embrace my clumsiness. I love you, cheers to the New Year!

Cheers to having all of you in my life in 2018!

This weeks song is a song which is very close to my heart. Teach me how to be loved by Rebecca Ferguson. A powerful woman, with a beautiful voice and a lot of emotion in her music.

See you next year! Love, Renée x