I have questions about what to do… I feel stuck in the situation I’m in. It’s safe, but if I leave the other person may do reckless things…

Hello. I am a 29 year old Female, engaged to a 28 y o man I met at the University. We love and adore each other and he is smitten by me. I love him and we share a very sweet bond. But I have realized that I am not very sexually attracted to him. I have spoken to different guys and also have dated previously. But the bond and emotional connection I share with him I haven’t felt with anyone else. But where he is extremely attracted to my body and finds me very beautiful even in shabby clothes and hair, I don’t feel so turned on. We have had sex many times and he always seems to be wanting a lot more while I like doing it maybe once or twice a day (we are in long distant and meet for say, 3 4 days after months). As Indians we also have to struggle a lot to convince our families for the wedding and he is taking a stand against his family for me. I know that he is going to be a great husband and a father to children in the future. I might be sounding slightly selfish here. But I also want that while he gets love and great sex, I too feel attracted to him. It frightens me to think that what if I have to live all my life like this and despite marrying such an amazing guy, I will be unhappy. I also cannot dream of losing him or letting him go because that will hurt me as well as scar him for life. I can see how much he loves me and he is almost obsessed with me. I wish I was obsessed with him too. We’d be so much more happier and we already are quite happy.

I would like to ask for help around a difficult situation that I am in and do not know what to do anymore. My wife no longer wants contact with my family. In recent years, there have been several instances where my parents have sometimes made blunt or veiled remarks to my wife. In addition, in certain cases, they did not take into account, for example, her dietary requirements during the Christmas dinner. When our child was born and my mother came to help she was more interested in getting rid of the laundry so that I wouldn’t have to do it after work (that’s how she said it) instead of taking care of my wife and her grandchild. This was (among other things) the last straw for my wife. She herself has a past with narcissistic parents/family with whom she is broken and does not want a repeat of that. To be seen, to be there, to be loved, etc. are important subjects for her.

By now I haven’t seen my family for over a year due to the whole situation and this is starting to break me down. I feel gloomy, yo-yo in weight (eating a lot out of emotion and then losing weight again) and have little joy in things where I felt that before. I tried to talk to my mother but she immediately becomes defensive and it was not intended that way. This just makes my wife angrier.

Despite everything, I would still like to have a relationship with my family, but I know that my wife doesn’t really approve of that. It seems to her that I don’t support her and I don’t love her; how can you still want to see them after what they did to me? I do love her, but I don’t want to lose my family. I myself had a normal childhood, but I do realize that certain things were crooked, such as my emotionally absent father and my mother who seems to have trouble with daughters-in-law (covered remarks that it is usually their fault instead of her sons).

How can I convey to my wife that I love her in spite of everything? And is it fair and not selfish that I want that?

My husband experiences a lot of stress in life, not only at work but also privately.
He experiences that the world is moving faster and faster, the digitization that continues, and he feels a great lag in this. On the one hand because novelties do not interest him, but also because he does not understand them. If someone were to explain everything to him (eg a new computer program at work, installing an app on the mobile phone, a recipe for cooking,…. ) this would help, according to him, but it would still require an enormous effort from him.
He has no hobbies and doesn’t really know what he likes. In your list of 141 fun activities, only one he ticked, and this is 88. take a walk (and then just the walk around the pond he takes every day, definitely not a new environment).
He has now been home for 2 weeks on a doctor’s prescription but since he doesn’t know what he likes, he’s starting to feel worse and he thinks he is worth even less….
How can I help him?

Hi, I am a 32-year-old woman. Already 9 years in a nice relationship with a sweet man who does everything for me. We have a nice house and 2 sweet, healthy sons aged 5 and 6 years.

In every relationship I’ve ever had I cheated and I still do, I’ve never felt better because of it but I still can’t stop and I don’t really understand why. I have the best sex with my own partner and if it’s up to him it happens often enough! Yet I continue to have the uncontrolled need to challenge other men and I won’t rest until I’ve conquered them… Which makes me really bummed every time afterwards. Why am I doing this?

Hello, I am experiencing quite a lot of stress from a family member I live with. They can be very irritable, argumentative and explosive. This is not something temporary, by the way, but rather the attitude of that person for a much longer period of time.
How can I better protect myself against this? By the way, I am not able to leave home in the short term. In addition, setting boundaries or expressing my feelings often makes little sense. It seems that the person sometimes does the opposite on purpose because the person thinks they know better what to do in a situation. Even if I isolate myself or take time for myself, it creates conflict. What can I do best in this situation? I always feel like I have to walk on eggshells and I sometimes feel physically sick due to the constant tension and negativity.

I was abused 4 years ago and because of that, I went into therapy. This really helped me a lot, but now that I’m in a relationship some things come very close and I have problems trusting my boyfriend and letting go.

What can I do about it?

I have a lot of stress at school and sport. I do my sport every day and also go to school. Plus, my best friend and I are in a fight. Do you have any tips on how to deal with this?

I have had persistent fatigue complaints for 4 years. After a lot of testing, they found out that I have CFS a year ago. I was then sent via the doctor to a psychologist who, after a few conversations, referred me to a hospital psychologist. Talking to both psychologists didn’t seem to help and I wasn’t sure what to do with it. I thought it was just me and basically gave up hope. Lately, I often feel sad alone and anxious. Do you have any tips/advice for me?

From the age of 6, I was bullied for ten years straight, for no reason whatsoever. After this, I let myself get used, abused, and raped by all kinds of people I trusted or put above myself. Next, I was trapped in narcissistic ‘marriage’. I’ve finally escaped and I’m ‘free’. But I immediately ended up in another toxic relationship. At first, I thought it was all good. However, his true colours are showing now and I’m thrown out in the garbage daily to then be taken out again. I just can’t get rid of it. There are so many things broken about me, about how my system works. Sometimes I am very self-destructive, especially in my head and that also expresses itself physically. I really wish there was someone I could talk to and help me figure out what’s wrong with me.