Break ups are certainly no fun but sometimes they are inevitable. Going through a breakup can be devastating. The experience of splitting from a partner can make you feel lonely but it could help to remind yourself that there are tons of people going through something similar everyday. There are also plenty of different philosophies on getting over breakups, but the truth is there is no right way to heal from a breakup. If you’re looking for some helpful reassurances and guidance when it comes to healing a broken heart, here are some tips.

Consider the science

Heartbreak affects your dopamine levels. That is the reason why you might feel stressed out, anxious, and/ or crave to see seeing the person. Your dopamine level decreases as the love you once had dissolves or the breakup occurs. It’s confusing because you might crave a person who is actually ‘bad’ for you, but knowing that it’s partially the fault of chemicals in your brain could be helpful. This also means that craving isn’t a magical sign you should be together: it’s just your dopamine levels adjusting.

Keep a diary

You will probably feel a huge urge to text or call your ex. Instead of seeking out, write down what you want to say to the person you’re missing. Continue to write whatever comes to mind, but don’t send it. Give yourself some time to grief. Usually what you wrote doesn’t feel as pressing as it did when you were really upset and in addition you may discover more about how you feel.

Distract yourself

It’s easy to just lay in bed for days and let the sadness take control of you. Of course you need time to process everything what happened but distraction is also an effective way to heal. Doing something novel activates new and different parts of the brain, plus it’s a chance to be creative or even meet new people. It could be healing to find something that you love doing that has no connection to your former partner. Having an activity that is not only distracting but also has no connection to your former partner could really help soothe your heartache.

Get to know yourself better

There is always something new to learn and grow from when you go through something like a breakup. Recovering from heartbreak really does make you stronger because you are forced to look at the reasons you’re hurting and the reasons you love yourself. It will get better but have patience regarding how you’re healing.

Unfollow

It’s really important to unfollow and unfriend your ex across social media platforms. It is vital to your healing because a lot of the time, if you have access to an ex’s social media, it becomes easy to build a narrative for how they are doing. Usually these narratives are incomplete at best and most often inaccurate. You can’t focus on what you need to do to take care of yourself if you are still trying to see how your ex is spending their days. If you’re not entirely ready to unfriend or unfollow your ex, consider starting by muting your ex’s social media so it doesn’t appear in your feed when you’re not expecting it.