Porn addiction

Thank you so much for submitting your question! You suspect that you have an addiction. Let me first tell you more about the processes involved in addiction.

Every person has a reward system in the brain that gives nice feelings in certain situations. You can think of good food or winning a competition, but also think of using drugs and gaming. Situations that go through that system can therefore have an 'addictive' effect, as it were. Social contact, receiving positive appreciation, having sex and watching porn also go through the same system.

Addiction is often related to withdrawal. Withdrawal causes stress and anxiety. It is a person's natural response to reduce anxiety. And let the substance (drugs, gaming or watching porn) give 'rest' again. It also shows that it is often about being able to deal with or endure unrest and negative emotions.

You say that seeking help right now is not convenient. Know that you are not the only one experiencing this and so you are not alone. These kinds of complaints are often accompanied by a lot of shame. It can help to check the Internet to see how many others have it and what they are doing to get help. There are also websites with fellow sufferers, such as this one: https://www.relatietherapeuten.net/forum-lotgenoten-seksverslaving-pornoverslaving

What can you do yourself?

• Consider your response to anxiety. To what extent are you able to deal with certain emotions? Can you tolerate restlessness? What exactly feels so unpleasant when you allow it and don't act on it? Good emotion regulation is an important foundation.
• Talk to loved ones. It is often a relief to make your situation known to someone you trust. I would like to ask you to read the following article: https://niceday.app/en/this-is-how-you-share-how-you-are-really-doing/