Print What is self-image?
Self-image is the way you see and value yourself. It’s like a pair of glasses through which you view yourself, influenced by your experiences, interactions with others, beliefs, and how you talk to yourself (internal dialogue). You can speak of a positive, realistic self-image when, for example, you have appreciation of yourself, can acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses, have compassion for yourself, believe in yourself, feel that you matter, and deserve happiness in life.
What are the consequences of a low self-image?
When you suffer from a low self-image, you may often feel down or insecure, fear rejection, feel worthless or hopeless, or even hate yourself. You might be reluctant to take action or initiative, try new things or learn, or worry excessively about doing these. You may also try to confirm your low self-image, meaning you unconsciously look for examples or reasons why you might not be good enough, don’t belong, or have failed, and for example reject compliments or attribute successes to luck. This creates a vicious cycle where you avoid (new) positive things and have a tendency to focus on everything that is wrong or what you can’t do. This form of self-confirming a low self-image is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What influences a self-image?
In addition to your genetics, your upbringing and impactful experiences play an important role in developing a low self-image. As a child, it is important to learn to discover things on your own, receive realistic positive reinforcement, and grow up in a safe environment where you feel valued, capable, and confident. This stimulates the development of a positive self-image. The risk of a low self-image increases when you experience exclusion or rejection through bullying, abuse, or discrimination. This can also stem from stigma associated with mental or physical health problems, poverty, or other problems at home. Nowadays, social media also plays an increasing role by presenting unrealistic standards and expectations that can make you feel inferior.
Regarding upbringing, in addition to exclusion, neglect, and abuse, there are other examples that can contribute to developing a low self-image. It could be that your parents did not give you enough attention or that you were overly protected. Your parents might have excessively criticized you and gave little appreciation, or repeatedly compared you to a sibling. It could also be that you grew up in a family with high demands or where performance was heavily emphasized. Additionally, it contributes to a low self-image if you are only valued for one aspect. All these examples don’t necessarily only apply to your parents but can also relate to other people in your life, such as a partner.
Sources:
- Negatief zelfbeeld – Manja de Neef
- Comet voor negatief zelfbeeld – Kees Korrelboom
- https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/about-self-esteem/
